Frozen fries

Went to Montreal on Saturday for a great event. The launch of the 53rd Garnet Key at Concordia. For those who don't know the Key is an honours society of about 12 students, chosen for their top grades and general "all roundedness". This was the launch of the 53rd Key; Brian was in the fifth. They always invite, and make a fuss over, the old guys and it's usually a lot of fun.


Drove down Saturday morning and arrived in time for lunch at the Sofitel -- a very expensive French chain with a first-rate dining room. Not this time. Ordering the filet, I asked if the fries were "maison" or "congele". "Oh madame, we would never serve frozen frites here!" I then told her about lunching at the St. James Hotel a couple of years ago in Old Montreal. The St. James is another very expensive place and I had asked the same question of the waiter there. Same answer -- never frozen, not here madame! When I asked the maitre'd why they lie about the fries, he said, "Don't tell me you come all the way to Montreal just for the fries!" Duh! So what if I do? He just sniffed me off. I was livid.

So -- after gaily ha-ha-ing about that fiasco with the waitress -- we ordered the Sofitel frites. One bite and I knew they were frozen. You don't raise four kids without knowing a frozen french fry in an instant. I could not believe it. A waitress bare-face lying while talking about another waitress bare-face lying about fries. You could not make it up. Another waitress confirmed the frozen fries and said, "Well, we'd have to have more staff just to cut them all up." Whaaaat???!!!! At $110 for lunch, there's lots of margin in there to pay someone to grab a knife and cut the potatoes. And don't they have machines for this? I told the smug manager about the lying waitress and she practically fell on the floor, grovelling about how sorry she was and blah, blah. I said, "I know what you're going to do about this, zero. You don't even ask my name -- nothing. You're going to go back into the kitchen and moan about an "ancienne maudit anglaise" complaining about frites. I know you don't give a s--t." I asked for the general manager's card and plan to write him a wakeup letter.

When the Sofitel first opened, the chef's were flown in from Paris and the food was beyond the beyond. A few years on and everyone has gone back to sleep. Casse-croute fries remain the best in the province, sorry to say.