Alberta's re-location tax

It's not official, but Alberta has a re-location tax. It's called "getting your out-of-province car certified for licencing". My daughter had warned me about how hard they were on "foreign" cars in Alberta, but I dismissively waved her off. "My car is in perfect shape, that won't be a problem for me. Was I wrong. What an ordeal! And costly. Granted, my Civic is a 2001, but it is the only car I have kept serviced perfectly, meeting all the service dates and replacing parts as required. I even had the Ottawa mechanic pull the entire service record before we left, confident that would be all I'd need to have it signed off in seconds and re-plated. Not on your life.

Decided to take it to a local Honda dealership, where the mechanics would certainly know the vehicles innards. For the certification exam, there is a flat fee of $190 -- but that just tells you if your car passes or fails. Confident my Civic would breeze through, I awaited their call. "We estimate it will cost you $2,200 to get your car up to Alberta standards." Whaaaaat!$%&%%^$%??!!! The item that caused me to pull the car and get a second opinion was an estimated $272 to fix a backseat belt that would not latch. How could it take 1.5 hours and nearly $300 to fix a buckle!!?? I smelled huckster.

What you have to know is that Calgary is a town of a lot of jalopies. It's only newcomers whose cars have to be up-to-snuff; the locals gaily motor around in big, honkin', smelly pickups and shaky, old pails. B hit the computer and found another small garage, also authorized to issue a certificate, and off we went. This time the estimate was under $1,000 -- including another $190 for a second inspection. A $1,200 saving. That is the size of the ripoff I was being handed at the dealership. Car people are still hucksters. If you're not a mechanic yourself, you are (un)fair game.

Outrageous. But $920 later, the Civic has a shiny new licence plate and a new lease on life as a cute, little cowboy car. I am happy.