Letter from Bermuda, part VI

"It's rare to meet an American working here," I said to the young beach attendant at our hotel.  "I'm not American, I'm Bermudian," he replied.  All of the staff were varying shades and hues of black, so he stood out like a sore thumb because he was as blonde and white as the driven snow. 

Chatting with him I learned his family went back to the 1600s, when Bermuda was first colonized.  In fact, his mother was a Trimingham -- of the famous family that owned the posh landmark store in Hamilton.  "Yeah, the two brothers who inherited it ran it into the ground, unfortunately," he told me.  "It's now a bank, gone."  Sad that Trimingham's has poofed. 

Turns out he had gone to Dalhousie University and loved Canada.  "Well, we share the same head of state, Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II," I added.  "Do you know how many Canadians don't know that," he replied.  "It's amazing, I had to tell many students that your Prime Minister was not the head of state."  Not surprised in the least.  It's a sad reality that Canadian kids have no clue about our Constitution.  Man, his family must have closely guarded its gene pool for a young man to be so blonde and white after that many generations in Bermuda.  Turns out his parents just moved to Vancouver.  "They got tired of everyone knowing everything about everyone in every Parish 'cause that's what it's like in Bermuda," he told me. 

The resident population of Bermuda is about 60,000, which seems a lot for an island that's only 21 miles long and 4 wide.

Sitting on the plane leaving the island, B and I were on either side of a middle-aged white gentleman.  "Did you enjoy your vacation here?" I asked him.  "I'm not a tourist, I'm a Bermudian," he replied.  This really threw me -- the second native Bermudian I had met.  Turns out he was a dentist with four kids and he talked my ear off -- hard to do with me because my tongue is usually the one wagging the hardest.  Guess where he was going?  Wait for it....on vacation to.......Haliburton!  Here's a guy who lives in paradise, but goes to Northern Ontario two or three times a year to his cottage to be greeted by black flies and rain!  How weird is that. 

"No wonder your teeth are so dazzlingly white," I said.  "I rinse with peroxide," he told me.  Whaaaaaat?!  I may try it because obviously it works.  Funny, here's a dentist getting paid to do all kinds of fancy procedures to whiten people's teeth and the guy uses peroxide.  One other tip?  Never use toothpaste with an electric toothbrush.  "You'll wear away your enamel."  Who knew?!   

"One in 10 of every species is homosexual," he said a-propos-of-nothing and completely out-of-the-blue.  "And that includes fruit flies," he added.  Now, there's a little-known fact I can bore future cocktail party-goers with.  He then went on to tell me about several of his married friends with kids who were gay, which didn't surprise me in the least.  "One kept asking me if I thought he was gay," he said.  "Well, if you have to keep asking, then yes."

Yep, travel is broadening.