Flip-laps

"Don't forget your flip-laps 'Amma," says grandson Jack, as we are about to venture to the beach in Galveston yesterday.  "My what?"  "Your flip-laps!"  Asked because I just wanted to hear him say it again.  Too cute.  "Alligators" are "elevators"........plus a host of other slightly off words, as he begins to master English.  And don't even get me started on adorable granddaughter Caitlin.  She is all vowels and consonants; words aren't really her speciality yet, but you can certainly understand her.

"Are those are my clothes?" asks Jack, spying the piles destined for our other grandson, Reed.  "Yes, and it's so nice of you to give them to him," I add.  "Baby Reed needs these clothes," confirms Jack generously.  How sweet. 

Just walked in the door from our visit to Houston.  At the airport dropping us off, Sarah wasn't sure of the terminal (Houston has a ton), so she asked B to get out and ask.  In he lumbers.  As he stood staring blankly at a hundred screens, Sarah lept out of the car and ran up to the first-class agent.  "Excuse me," said our veteran of the hospitality industry, "My parents are old and I am trying to help them check in.  Where should they go?"  (She knows how to deal with people perfectly, just act dumb and pity takes over.)  "I'll take them right here," the agent says.  In we schlep and her supervisor says, "Are you first-class?"  "I'm taking them here," says the first-class agent.  The supervisor backs off.  So bing, bang, boom, we drop off our bags, brilliant Sarah having checked us in earlier from home.

Then it's off to security screening, where B is asked to practically stip naked.  "My pants will fall down if I take off my belt," he explains.  "I'm sorry, sir, you have to remove your belt."  "Well, it won't be the first time I've dropped my pants in public," he deadpans.  The two agents burst into laughter.  Charmingly, having lost a bunch of weight, his trousers settled endearingly around his knobby knees.  Too bloody funny!

I always "beep" because I won't take off my bracelets and bling for anyone.  Usually I get "wanded", but today it was the full body scan x-ray.  Hey, enjoy my derriere in technicolour!

Then it's off to another "Priority Lounge".  But in Houston, there is actually no actual food...actually.   Just fruit and cheese and crackers, oh, and booze.  So we snacked and then boarded the plane, to be met by two "old" stewardesses.  I love the fact that they don't force them to retire at 30-something anymore.  Why did women put up with this for so many thousand years??!!  A sad and demeaning North American version of the burkha, for G-d's sake.  These ladies were in their fifties....B estimated even 60s.  "I have worked for United since I started 30 years ago," replied one when B indelicately asked how long she had been with United.  Geeze, B, why not just ask her her friggin' age!! 

Style alert:  stewardesses have the most fabulous jewellery -- absolutely expensive and perfectly elegant.  But I gotta tell you once again, a $5 pair of earrings from Shoppers out-does expensive every time. 

Well, off to Kona tomorrow!