Stupid Hair

My previous blog ended with a comment about a woman having "stupid hair".  What is "stupid hair"?  In my book it's:

• Hair with no style, as if someone just cut it with no clue or "statement"
• Hair with no shape, see above
• Dyed hair with visible roots
• Short hair that's not really short
• Short hair that needs cutting
• Long hair that needs cutting
• Medium hair that needs cutting
• Flat blonde hair dyed too many times
• Streaked hair dyed so many times it's flat blonde
• Dark dyed hair on a woman way too old to still have dark hair
• Burgundy hair on anyone
• Any dyed hair

I firmly believe, as I have blogged before, we "are" our hair.  Our hair makes the ultimate statement about who we think we are, or want to be.  Often our hair "matches" us; more often it doesn't.  Just as what we wear speaks immediately about who we fancy we are, our hair speaks more loudly.

I remember in university long, straight hair was the only hair any girl had.  The frizzy, white, afro-au-natural fad hadn't kicked in.  Problem was, mine was naturally-curly.  What did I do?  Ironed it.  One day, draped ridiculously and precariously over the ironing board, I experienced a moment of epiphany.  "What the hell am I doing this for?  This is not 'me'."  I promptly went out and had it cut completely off -- and I mean "off", to an inch all over.  Vainly I said to myself, "I don't need hair," meaning like the rest of you do to get a date.  How big-headed was that! 

The second epiphany occurred 25 years later at 45, standing in the bathroom with a bottle of hair dye, pointlessly trying to cover the grey.  "What am I doing this for?  This is not 'me'," I repeated.  Once again, promptly went out and asked "Dan" to start the process of getting rid of the dyed hair.  I know I have blogged this before, but it's worth repeating.  The feeling of freedom and authenticity that comes from enjoying your "real" hair is exquisite.

But ladies, if you find the courage to go grey or white, for G-d's sake, have a style.  Don't just let it hang in ugly clumps. 

So, that's what I think of "stupid hair".